Growing up …in a small town…

You know you live in a small town. You know there exists a big world outside your small town and the temptations of the bigger fancier city tug incessantly at your innocent mind .You are keen to make it to that world and you try all in your might to reach there.

 But as you go about life, you do live up in a big,big way and make the best of your years in your pretty little haven.

And here are some trifle but memorable joys or bumps that unfurl as you grow up and that shape up your personality in a way nothing else can ....

1. You have ten uncles and twenty aunts staying in the neighborhood  You can park yourself in one in every twenty houses in the city, if need be. Flip side, you can never keep a secret from anyone, no matter how innovatively you try to. One of those uncles or aunts or “not-so-friendly” cousins / neighborhood urchins is bound to tell on you.

What this does to you in long term is make you more accountable and responsible , if only for fear of being caught !

2. If somebody asks you for directions to a place, you give it by the names of them famous people the whole town knows and put all the maps and GPSes to shame. For example, you say “Go a little ahead and the house next to XYZ’s house is what you are looking for “and not “Take first left and second right and you will reach your destination.“

You learn to be handy and helpful to others and have and provide alternatives in life for everything, if you miss the main bus!

3. You and your elder siblings go to the same school/college? Have fun, baby .You get hauled up every time you do not win the sports trophy like your sister does and also, every time your brother cooks up an interesting science project. It’s a totally different and unnoticeable thing that you excel in your academics and your co-curricular activities…you share common teachers and comparisons abound .

While it does seem to harm your childish self esteem, what it really does is prepare you to stand on your own amongst the crowd and create your own mark.

4. You like your brother’s friend. Kill -Joy! Your brother likes your friend’s sister!! Be nice to your brother if you want to live your life. In essence, let him live his life and he will not make yours hell-

Sibling bonding is a great thing –you realise later in life. 

5. Want to throw your parents a surprise party on their wedding anniversary? Need money from the savings account that you wrangled for yourself after cajoling and convincing your parents that you do not plan to elope with your existent or non-existent boyfriend using all that money? Well, think again .News travels faster than lightning in these parts and your dad gets a phone call from the bank manager even before you land your feet in the house!

Well, your parents always had a point in trying to discipline you , keep you under check and you later learn they were mostly right.

6. Driving around is easy.DL is not an issue. You can achieve so much more with that mobility in a day than you could in a week in a big city – early morning tuitions, afternoon college, late afternoon computer classes, evening out with friends, late night coffee in a lassi shop( What? small cities do not have coffee shops!!), a movie or bit of shopping in between and a lot of errands that you would have run for your mom ,spanning the entire length and breadth of the city - all in a day’s time .

What is it that big city morons keep complaining about “Parking woes “and “Traffic jams”? They happen on Jupiter, not on Mother Earth!

You realise that life is fast when you think fast and act fast .There is so much you can accomplish if you only let your body and mind be mobile and active. You also learn that the more you do , the more you miraculously get time and energy to do!

7. Oversped? Skipped the red light? So what? Your dad or your friend’s dad or atleast someone’s dad is a friend of the DC. If not DC, then atleast the SP .If not SP, then atleast the traffic police uncle?Ok, not really needed as you can easily wriggle your way out by pleading with the constable bhaiya to pardon you this time as you are just a wimpy kid with no pocket money to pay challans or fill in their pockets. You will behave well next time, you swear by God and by your dad’s influence!

On similar lines…missed the college admission deadline? Need some rules to be tweaked to accommodate your preferences? Well, it’s not always easy but then what use is that neighbourhood college principal for if not help you get a back door entry or a preferential treatment!

Above definitely make you thank your stars for your resources and also teach you how to create

your support system once you are out on your own.Resourcefulness is a lifeskill and you realise it early enough in life.

8. Your cousins from that big city nearby wear the trendiest of the clothes .You and your friends feel they dress quite funnily for your taste. The truth is that you are actually struggling to find decent styles for yourself in your small town fish-market.

But what are you, if not creative? Your cousins envy you because you paint your own Ts, tear your own denims and design your own dresses! Your small town does not offer the brands but who says you cannot buy label stickers and flash them on your own brand of clothes!

Again, you learn to innovate and create things efficiently and economically ( within the budgets of your pocket money!).You stay in vogue despite the odds and this shows for your resilience and determination!

9. A friend’s birthday and the gang wants to celebrate, sing, dance and hog on food. But your Neanderthal town’s cultural scene does not offer any discs and pubs. You either do not party – which is not your choice-Or you create your own party place – which is what you do. Fused lights & bulbs, assembled music systems, someone’s terrace, someone’s mom’s delicious cooking – all yours to jam with. Party the night on someone’s rooftop, as some silly singer said!

You are grown up and you think you can buy yourself some adult stuff (read: liquor and cigarettes) for the party above? Well, no luck there. You may be old enough but none of the store owners believe so .Even if they did, they would still tell your folks at home. So you happily stick to the fizzy colas and the finger foods!

Friends are for life and you retain the ones who were partners in crime when you started out in life! You also learn that you can go as far as you allow yourself to and that there is no such thing called as lack of resources!

  

10. Done with the partying and fooling around, if you do get serious about life and decide to make something of it, your small town does not really offer you much exposure or opportunity to realise your dreams. You think you know it all but then you stumble upon things once in a while that make you realise there is much more to the world than meets your eye. You either make peace with what is on offer and easily available or you stick to your deep rooted desires, kindle the fire and prepare yourself to go out and tackle the world stage.

Because you know you have limited opportunities and a lot at stake ( like your parents’ money and their faith), you develop a kind of seriousness of purpose and a spirit of competitiveness that arises only out of that undying desire to succeed against all odds and that helps you move forward and achieve your dreams and not rest until you have done that.

In nutshell, you learn to dream, to struggle, to achieve, to prove, to resist, to create, to innovate, to fight and last but not the least, to let the fire burn.And what you learn in this process of growing up is what stays with you throughout your life.